I’ve been feeling pretty unsure about myself and the direction my life has been going lately. To be honest, I’ve been really stressed and anxious about it (does it even have direction?) so the other night I actually took some time to sit down, and write out my goals. This was the first time I think I’ve ever actually sat down and detailed a goal before; and let me just say I feel so much better now that I have a plan and some direction.

I’ve always been told that setting goals is important, but it never really clicked as to why. I just saw sitting down and writing out my goals as a pain in the ass, so I never really did it. I also think it’s kind of scary to actually materialize your goals like that (what if you never accomplish them!).

Before I get into my 12 steps on effective goal setting (which I condensed from Brian Tracy’s Psychology of Success–yes, I’m a huge nerd) let me just talk briefly about why so few people set specific goals for themselves. I know more than one of these reasons applied to me, and when I saw it on paper I realized what a coward I was being.

1)      People don’t understand the importance of having goals, so they don’t bother to set any. I remember reading a study done on Harvard students. After graduation, the graduates were interviewed and asked if they had set specific goals for their life after college, and if they had mapped out a plan to achieve these goals. Only 3% had. What was really interesting to me is that in a 20-year-after follow up study, it was found that the 3% who had mapped out goals and a means of achieving them had a higher net worth than the other 97% of the graduating class. Combined!

Another reason to set and write out goals is it ingrains them into your subconscious. Our subconscious controls a lot of our automated actions and thoughts. It makes sense to have these thoughts and actions align with what we want in life.

Also consider that all really successful people have or have had definite goals. Seriously: go talk to anyone you believe to be very successful and ask them. I try to avoid absolutes but I feel like this one is pretty true, and profound.

2)      Fear of rejection. We are afraid to have goals because we fear others might belittle us or tell us we can’t accomplish it, we’re too slow, too uneducated, etc. This is why it is best to only share your goals with other people who set goals and would be excited to encourage you. Otherwise, keep them to yourself.

3)      Fear of failure. This fear comes from the lack of realization that failure is a necessary part of achieving any worthwhile success. You will never realize your goal until you have taken the knocks, done the grunt work, and learned the lessons necessary to achieve greatness. What did Edison say? ‘I haven’t failed in making the light bulb, I’ve successfully identified 5,000 ways that it can’t be made’- something like that. You get the message.

4)      People don’t know how to set goals. I didn’t. I had to go out and learn. Here is the best process I’ve found so far. Here are the steps:

1)      The first thing is identify something that you want badly. It has to be a burning desire. And make it something completely selfish, for example avoid goals like “I want to lose weight for my boyfriend”. A goal has to be completely personal and selfish.

2)      2^nd Step: Belief. You have to believe you can do it, so set realistic goals. If you’re conscious mind can’t accept the goal, your subconscious won’t either. If you want to increase your income, increase it in %50 increments (annual salary). This is believable. Make realistic steps that you can visualize and affirm. Your goals should make you stretch, and have a 50/50 chance of working. 50/50 means it’s gonna be hard, it’s gonna take you out of your comfort zone; but it also means its very likely to happen.

3)      3^rd Step: Write it down– this is how you program it into the subconscious. Write it in vivid detail. Use sensory descriptions.

4) Determine all the ways you will benefit from achieving your goal. Usually there is more than one perk that comes with reaching a goal. Maybe its more money, more respect, or simply increased self confidence for attaining your goal. The more reasons you can give your mind to do it, the more motivation you will have.

5)      Determine exactly where you are today in regards to your goal. How can you measure progress and know where you are going if you don’t know where you start?

6)      Set a deadline. Make it quantifiable. Measurable. The only time we feel happy, like a winner, is when we are moving towards a goal. Unless we can clearly measure the start, the end, and our steps along the way, we won’t have that winning feeling which is a huge motivation/makes us positive.

7)       Determine the obstacles along the way. A goal must have obstacles by definition. If it didn’t, it’s just an activity. Identify the hurdles, and resolve to pay the price to get through them. (They usually look a lot more manageable on paper, btw).

8)       Identify the knowledge you will need to get in order to attain your goal. All worthwhile goals will require that you learn and gain new knowledge. So find out what you need to know, and then learn it.

9)      Identify groups/mentors/people you will need to cooperate with you on your way to your goal. Figure out what you are going to do for them in order to get their cooperation.

10)    Make a plan- and make it detailed. Make a list of activities you will need to do, then list them in order of time and priority. This plan is dynamic, go back and change it constantly. It will need adjustments along the way.

11)    Make a clear visualization of your goal as already accomplished. Play that picture of your goal in your mind frequently. The more the better.

12)   Back your plan with determination and resolve. Make the absolute, unequivocal commitment to get it done, to pay the price. JUST WIN BABY.  Self discipline is persistence in action, and persistence is a measure of your belief in yourself. If you are very willing to pick  yourself up every time, it becomes very obvious to your subconscious that you believe strongly in your ability.

If you don’t have any goals, it’s probably the best thing you can do for yourself. Now. And just have one at a time, so you can  focus on it fully.

This entry was posted on Monday, November 23rd, 2009 at 8:58 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.